“Ok, so can you describe some of your personal boundaries?” 

When my therapist first asked me that question, I had no answer. My mind went blank. The answer I eventually gave was something along the lines of “I guess I don’t really know what my boundaries are, or what it feels like to set one.” Yikes. For all the reading, learning, and healing I thought I’d been doing around my mental health, I had somehow managed to understand the concept of boundaries without ever thinking to apply them to myself. 

The conversation about boundaries really took off online this past year during COVID-19 in large part because we, as a general population, went from being already-pretty-online to exclusively-and-entirely-online basically overnight. It’s pretty hard to interpret text alone, and it can be especially tricky to interpret brief snippets of text from someone you’ve never interacted with before. 

Everyone has different expectations and rules around how social media interactions should work, what kind of responses they’re entitled to, and which emojis and punctuation are acceptable to use in any given context. And since doomscrolling isn’t a particularly stress-free activity, many of us are likely engaging with social media while stuck in fight-flight-freeze-fawn mode. 

This means that our brains are seeking out potential threats and then engaging with them automatically as if they were genuinely life-threatening, which can really quickly derail and escalate an otherwise pretty standard conversation. It’s basically the perfect recipe for miscommunication, misunderstanding, and harmful behaviour. 

There are a lot of really important conversations happening online, and it’s normal to want to contribute and participate. That said, if we’re going to have productive, nuanced, world-improving conversations, we need to be sure that we can increase our tolerance for discomfort, and know when we need to disconnect. Boundaries are a big part of that. But let’s start from the beginning.

What is a boundary?

There are a number of ways to think about boundaries. Here are a couple:

Your skin is the outer barrier of your body, the dividing line where you physically end and the rest of the world begins. Boundaries are the emotional equivalent of that. 

They’re the private rules you set with yourself (no work on weekends, no spending money after 9PM, intentionally booking some “me-time” and not letting anything interrupt) and the ones you speak aloud in order to protect your energy (I don’t have time for that, I’m not interested in taking on this project, I’m not comfortable discussing this with you).

At its core, it’s realizing and acknowledging that you are not responsible for the emotional state of others, just as they are not responsible for yours. 

Ashley Brodeur has another really helpful way to think of boundaries (doors in a house that you can open, close, and even lock):

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It’s important to note that your boundaries end where another person begins. That is to say, not everyone has the same boundaries as you, and we must be mindful that we’re not forcing our boundaries on other people, just as we’re mindful that they’re not forcing their boundaries onto us. 

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A post shared by CommUnity Empowerment Services (@givemethecues)

Where do we learn boundaries?

Our caregivers (parents, teachers, mentors, etc) model boundaries and boundary setting while we grow up. If your caregivers did not set or respect each other’s boundaries, you might have internalized that you shouldn’t set boundaries, or worse, that setting boundaries is dangerous or selfish. This can often result in someone, once they’re an adult, overachieving, never saying no, and prioritizing everyone else’s needs above their own. If this sounds familiar, sorry for the pointed (but loving) call out. 

The flip side of this is internalizing that other people’s boundaries are more flexible than they actually are. If you have a very strong reaction to someone telling you “no” and setting firm boundaries, it might be worth examining why that is. Do you expect to always have access to those close to you? Why is that?

Need some tips for setting boundaries with family members? Check out this TikTok by KieVonne King:

@kievonneking

Dealing with Difficult Family Members? Try this. ##mentalhealth ##explorerpage##plantmom ##plantlife#m#entalhealthmatters #h#eal #f#amily #b#oundaries

♬ original sound - KieVonne King

Boundaries Online

Alright, here we go. The internet is a strange, sometimes wonderful, and often truly terrible place. 

It allows us to connect with people all over the world, all of the time. We are constantly shouting into the void, and often finding that it can shout back, and it sometimes does so in a way that’s really hurtful. It can be really easy to get wrapped up in the urgency and immediacy of the conversations happening online, consciously setting boundaries can help protect us, and others, from getting hurt. 

Publicly announcing boundaries

Not everyone does this, but it is becoming more of a common practice online, especially for activists, artists, and people who have large followings on Instagram. While Instagram itself is a “public” space, everyone still agrees to the terms and conditions to access the platform, and you still own your personal page. You can choose to keep it private, or make it public. It’s important to note that making your page public does not mean that anyone is entitled to your time and energy. 

Let’s imagine that your IG page is kind of like a public art gallery that you own, or perhaps a small shop within a larger shopping mall might be more apt. 

Regardless, we all know the classic rules for public spaces, right? No shoes, no shirt, no service. The people who follow you or engage with your posts are a guest in your space, which means you have every right to block them if they break your rules of engagement, no explanation needed. The same applies the other way, of course. 

You can post your boundaries publicly as a story highlight - you can check out Blair Imani’s RULES highlight, Wednesday Holmes’ Boundaries highlight, And Dr. Kiona’s NEW PPL highlight for some examples. Not everyone will read these, but it’s handy to keep them available so that you can direct people there if you get a big influx of followers. I’ve made a habit of finding and reading the boundaries of the people I follow when I arrive, just to make sure I’m being a respectful guest.

Not sure what boundaries for your page might look like? Here are some examples:

• Do not repost my content without permission or credit
• Only people who follow me can comment (this is a setting you can choose)
• I can make my account private whenever I choose
• I will reply to comments and DMs in my own time
• I have closed my DMs for the time being
• Hate speech will not be tolerated. Any comments containing hate speech will be deleted, and the accounts blocked.

Here’s an excellent example of some boundaries set by @girlsagainstoppression:

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Personal Boundaries

It’s important to examine your relationship with social media and set boundaries with yourself. By this point, most people know that social media is built to be as addictive as possible and, as such, the most controversial takes are usually the ones that get the most traction. That’s why it’s important to take a step back and really look at how you engage with the various platforms you have accounts on and consciously choose how you’ll be interacting with them going forward.

Here are some examples (yours might look totally different!):

• I only spend X amount of time on social media a day
• No social media before breakfast or after 8PM
• If a comment in a conversation I’m engaged in really upsets or angers me but I still want to engage, I take a pause and step away for a while before responding.

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A post shared by Annika Hansteen-Izora (@annika.izora)

If you’re not sure what kinds of boundaries to set, just try a few and see how they feel! When you notice yourself getting aggravated or feeling resentful towards a particular situation, online or otherwise, take a moment to assess those feelings. Did you or someone else cross over a boundary you didn’t know you had?

In discovering and setting your boundaries, you may upset some people who are used to having unfettered access to you and your energy. It’s really unfortunate when this happens, but remember that boundaries are, ultimately, an act of love, for yourself and for others. 

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Setting boundaries allows you to show up as your whole self when helping others, and because you know where your limits are, you can stop yourself from over-extending, growing resentful, and burning yourself out. If you’re not used to setting boundaries and feel a bit uncomfortable bringing them up with people you don’t know, try discussing your ideas about boundaries with a trusted friend, loved one, or therapist.

Photo by Chris Yang on Unsplash

I promise, it’s not like that prom scene from Carrie. 

If you’ve been taught that period sex is inherently gross, dirty, or shameful, I have news for you: that lesson was taught by the patriarchy. 

You’re not alone — many of us are taught from an early age that menstruation is gross, shameful, and something that should only be discussed behind closed doors (if at all). It isn’t a coincidence that we’re also taught all of those same things about sex. So, when you take two taboo subjects and put them together, what do you get? “Ugh, gross…”  

The effects of those early lessons about menstruation and sex don’t just go away when we get older; they stick with us as time goes on. So despite the fact that period sex can help relieve cramps, build intimacy, and be pleasurable for everyone involved, it generally gets pushed to the side.

Period sex has a bad reputation, but it didn’t do anything to deserve it. Here are four common myths about period sex debunked, plus what you really need to know about each one.  

Myth #1: “It’s going to be a bloodbath.”

We can chalk this one up as a half-truth. Unless you have endometriosis, PCOS, or another condition that causes extremely heavy bleeding, you probably don’t experience a heavy flow for your entire period. 

The amount of blood involved in period sex is going to depend on how much you’re bleeding that day and if you are using additional lubricants. Using lube doesn’t stop your flow, it basically dilutes the blood so you notice it less. 

If you want to have period sex and want to minimize the amount of blood involved, try: 

• Having sex in the shower
• Sticking to external play 
• Using barrier methods or gloves for easy clean-up
• Laying a dark towel or blanket down
• Using toys over period underwear

None of those things will get rid of the blood, they just create a little mental distance between you and it. There are tons of options, so play around and find something that feels good for you—that’s kinda the whole point! 

Myth #2: “It’ll feel gross for the non-menstruating partners.” 

First off, we each have our own personal yuck-o-meter that gauges how we feel about a particular situation. Second, period sex really doesn’t feel all that different from sex when someone isn’t menstruating. 

I once surveyed my Instagram followers and asked them what period sex felt like; the responses included “extra slippery”, “great, but stickier than normal”, “like a massage”, “liberating”, and “not all that different from any other time.” 

Those responses were from folks who menstruated and their partners. In fact, many folks with penises reached out to say that period sex was really fun and pleasurable for them. So, have a conversation with your partners to see how you all feel about it. If you’re just not sure, you can always try it out and say “hey, it’s not for me.” 

And if you’re down but your partner isn’t, that’s okay—period masturbation can be equally fun and pleasurable.

Myth #3: “You can’t get pregnant during period sex.”

This myth ultimately depends on your cycle, but in general—yeah, you can get pregnant if you have penis-in-vagina sex without using a barrier method while you’re on your period. The chances that someone who is menstruating would get pregnant are pretty low, but not zero, and it gets higher the later into your period you get.  

Your personal risk will depend on how long your cycle is, how consistent your cycle is, and what day sex happens. To minimize that risk, you can: use a barrier method, emergency contraception, or another form of birth control. You can also stick to types of play that can’t result in a pregnancy, like oral sex, mutual masturbation, or using toys on each other. 

Myth #4: “Having sex on your period is always painful.” 

Periods can come with physical discomforts, like back pain, muscle fatigue, and abdominal cramps. Some people also experience vaginal pain during their period, describing their vulva and vagina as feeling tender. Or, your cervix may feel particularly sensitive while you’re menstruating. 

That doesn’t mean that period sex is or should be painful, though. 

If you aren’t actively seeking out pain during sex, painful sex isn’t normal, so if you are experiencing pain during sex, talk with your doctor about it. I recommend keeping a journal monitoring your pain—what it feels like, what level it is, and what triggers it. Bring that journal with you to your appointment so that you have a clear record of what you’re experiencing. Pain with penetration can sometimes point to an STI, endometriosis, vaginismus, or vulvodynia. 

It could also be that you’re experiencing tissue inflammation, which can be painful. Try non-penetrative types of sex, like mutual masturbation, oral, or using fingers or a toy on your clit. If you still want to try out penetration, using a tool like the stackable rings by OhNut or a slim, short dildo can help make you more comfortable. 

You may have been raised to believe that period sex is totally off-limits and never OK, but the only person who can decide that is you (and your partners). If you decide it’s not for you, that’s fine! Just don’t let the misinformation and shame you were taught make that decision for you. 

And if you do decide that period sex is something you want to add to your sexual menu, then cool for you. 

Cassandra Corrado is a sex educator who works with adults to unlearn the harmful myths we learned when we were younger. Head to her website or Instagram to learn more!

Image via The Gender Spectrum Collection

We recently had Kim Rosas from Period Nirvana take over our Instagram Stories to answer some frequently asked questions about menstrual cups! Here's a recap, just in case you missed it. If you'd like to watch the videos to see visual examples of what she's describing, head to our Cup 101 highlight on our Instagram!

What’s the best reason to switch to a cup?

This biggest reason to switch to a menstrual cup, I always say, is comfort and convenience. And while that may be hard for some people to process because tampons seem so convenient, you just throw them away, and pack them and go, the convenience of not having to change anything for up to twelve hours is huge. You can go morning to night without having to think about locating bathrooms during your day or packing extra products for the day. In addition to that, menstrual cups are just so comfortable because they warm to your body’s temperature. They don’t rub, they’re not rigid, they’re not dry, and they don’t dry you out. In the end, you just have a far more comfortable period with a menstrual cup than you do with tampons.

Can a menstrual cup get stuck?

Sometimes it might worry you that your menstrual cup can be stuck, but this is really not possible. If you feel like the cup is stuck, know that you can remove it! You just need to break the suction. To do this, reach inside and pinch the cup to break the seal. You can either just pinch the base, or reach all the way up to the rim to give it a good squeeze. And then just gently pull down once the suction or that seal is broken. 

Tips for less painful cup removal?

So I think I actually got this tip from Lunapads, now Aisle, when we were talking about cups at an event and so I’m happy to share the tip that they gave to me that I’ve passed along numerous times. The pain or discomfort you feel when pulling the cup out is usually because you’re pulling it out unfolded when it went in folded. So it does make sense that you might have some discomfort. What I recommend is, instead of pulling straight down, you actually tilt the cup as you remove it, because that reduces the overall diameter as it exits. Of course, this might be a little messier, so make sure you’re over the toilet or do it in the shower, but that will definitely help.

What about cups and IUDs?

I want to preface everything I’m going to say in this segment with the fact that I am not a trained medical care provider or a doctor. But, I have spoken with and worked with care providers who have that training to get an understanding of how safe it is to use a menstrual cup with an IUD. And my assurance has always been that it is safe, you can use a menstrual cup with an IUD. What you need to do is always break the suction, the seal that the menstrual cup has, as a safety, just, even though from what I’ve been told it’s not enough to expel and remove an IUD based on the suction alone, it’s just good practice. And on top of that you want to be aware of where your strings are. Those will be shortened to the length that your care provider has cut. Make sure you’re not grabbing those when you do remove your menstrual cup.

What are the pros and cons of soft cups vs firmer cups?

Firmness is very subjective but what I will say is that softer cups are usually ones that more experienced cup users prefer because they are more comfortable, especially when it comes to outward pressure that can sometimes cause bladder pressure, or the urge to urinate, or even restrict urine. They are harder to get open when you fold them because they just need a little more assistance. I call them fiddle cups, sometimes you have to give them a hand. Something that’s firmer can be better for a first time user because firmer cups want to pop open and seal so there’s less chance of a leak, but, and they’re also better if you are very active and might have a strong pelvic floor that pushes against the cup, but then you have the issue of pressure. So you have to decide what’s going to work best for you and sometimes it’s trial and error. 

Can they be messy or leak?

I was very worried about the mess when I considered switching to a menstrual cup, which was eight years ago. And that’s still one of the biggest worries people have but I like to reassure everyone that it’s not a massacre or a scene from Carrie, it’s really not bad at all. What will happen is: you remove the cup, whether it’s full to the brim or just a little. As you pull it down, of course breaking the seal, you pull it down and it stays upright, everything stays inside of the cup. So when it’s removed, it’s still upright, and then you dump it out. My biggest tip if you’re brand new to cups and worried about the mess, is to remove it for the first time on your period in the shower. This is basically like a big splash zone for you so you don’t have to be worried about the mess. You’ll find that you’ll have little to no blood on your hands when you remove it straight down. 

As for the leak part of that question, menstrual cups can leak, and it often takes between one and three cycles to troubleshoot and get the cup working for you. If it continues to leak, it could mean it’s not the right cup for you, it could also mean you need to do more troubleshooting. Those are things that take time and, if you do need help, reach out to the manufacturer of your cup. They often have a way to help you, and they will message with you. You can also reach out to me @periodnirvana or there’s a group that I have on Facebook called Period Nirvana Community where you can do some troubleshooting amongst your peers. 

Can you dispel this myth regarding cup and body size that says fat people always need to size up?

When you are deciding on a menstrual cup size, size large or size small, it has nothing to do with body weight, or body size, or height, or any of those attributes. It is truly determined by your pelvic floor muscle tone and health. And those do somewhat align with other things that you might see in guided recommendations in age and pregnancy history. But again, it’s not a rule, it’s a guideline to just give you some reference for what size might be best for you. The more you know about your body, the better when it comes to picking the right size. So, under 30 and/or have not given birth tends to be the smaller size, due to the muscle tone-ness. Age tends to relax those pelvic floor muscles, unless you are continuing to exercise in a way that would strengthen them, or having had a pregnancy has loosened those muscles, so they say the larger size. And when I say size I’m always referring to diameter, and that is how menstrual cup brands will size their cups. It’s not about length. 

So the other thing you want to think about, completely outside of diameter is cervix height. So you will want to measure your cervix on your period, by basically reaching in with a finger (if you’re doing it yourself), finding your cervix, determining if it’s high, average, or low, and also making your choice based on that. Because a cup that’s too long and will not fit because you have a lower cervix is not going to work at all. So that is also as important, if not more important, than the diameter because diameter, if you just size up, vaginas are meant to accommodate and stretch. Typically I say just go ahead and size up if you’re on the fence, it should work out.

Is it just me or does the cup slip down a bit during the day? Is there a reason for this?

It’s not just you! Here’s my number 1 tip to keep it in place. I have given this tip, probably a thousand times, but it is my first line of defense when people tell me that their cups are slipping down during wear. One of the reasons could be that it’s too small of a diameter, one of the reasons could be that they need a firmer cup. But before you look at other cups and decide you need to spend more money, try this tip. As you are inserting your cup, bear down with your muscles like you’re having a bowel movement. So you’re basically pushing against the cup with your muscles as you insert. When you get it nice and high, release those muscles, and when you release them, it pulls the cup up and that can give you a very nice, secure fit, hopefully, that doesn’t walk down during the day, to the extent that you are birthing your cup.

What’s your favourite cup tip that helps many but often gets forgotten or overlooked?

So I just shared my favourite tip for fit, but one thing I do like to share is, when it comes to cleaning your cup, something that not everyone thinks of. So I like to fill my cup with soapy water, with a cup-safe wash, and then put my hand over it, flip it, and squeeze. And what this does is expel any of the gunk that tends to accumulate in the small suction holes. It’s my favourite way to wash the cup. 

That’s it for me and this takeover! If this was helpful and you need more menstrual cup help, I couldn’t get to every single question, so you can always find me @periodnirvana on Instagram. And I also post tons of informational content on the Period Nirvana Youtube and on periodnirvana.com

At Aisle, we hold ourselves accountable for the decisions we make, and part of that accountability is transparency. We’ve put together two reports, on our social and environmental impact and the work we did in 2020 to measure our impact on the planet and our community.

As a B Corp, we undertake a periodic assessment of our business based on a philosophy of a Triple Bottom Line - that businesses need to be fiscally, socially and environmentally responsible. We work on this all year, and we work hard to balance all the demands of our work to create the best possible outcomes for everyone. 

To be transparent, this is a lot of experimentation and give-and-take, and it’s not always perfect. We are still a really small business. We have much smaller budgets and staff than many of our competitors, and although that is not an excuse, sometimes we don’t have the capacity or influence to change the situation. We’re always striving to be the best we can be, and we appreciate all the feedback we receive! We read and consider all of it, and a lot of it inspires future plans.

Please see below for our 2020 Social Impact and Sustainability Reports. This was a uniquely challenging year (nobody had masks on their 2020 vision board in January) and also a year we did one of our most exciting projects: our life cycle analysis of our products. The hard data we received on our planetary impact was endlessly inspiring, and we transformed it into something to inspire and empower our community. Each product page now has an impact calculator that measures the impact of the choice to use reusables. Choices have power, and you are not only reducing waste but also greenhouse gas emissions. 

Looking forward to 2021, we have two key areas of investigation. One, we want to become more data-driven in our donations to measure our impact, and learn more about our carbon impacts and develop more specific policies around carbon emissions going forward. We look forward to keeping you in the loop about our work.

Click here to download our 2020 Social Impact Report.

Click here to download our 2020 Environmental Impact Report.

A. Rochaun Meadows-Fernandez is an award-winning writer, speaker and activist working to amplify Black women's voices in the mainstream dialogue, especially within conversations on health and parenting. She is also the founder of the #FreeBlackmotherhood movement.

Given a chance, I’d summarize my youth and adolescence in three words: awkward, anxious, and ambivalent.

I moved through my formative years feeling like I was either a punchline or a problem to be solved, thanks to my awkwardness, “nontraditional” performance of Blackness, and my hair. My Black peers ridiculed my over-enthusiastic classroom engagement. My few white peers used me as an opportunity for fetishization, making me feel like a specimen to be dissected. The only consistent message I received is that something about me was “off.”  And I was willing to accept this as absolute.

I paid for this internalization with gastrointestinal pain and headaches. There were countless days that my nervous stomach made me too sick to smile but not sick enough to miss the school bus. Missing school and having an extra day away from the teasing sounded great. Still, I knew acting out of fear would impact the three-person family, my mom, brother, and I had. I refused to rob them of rest and add letters of truancy to our growing pile of bills. 

Knowing that I had to “make it” to make things better for my mom and brother taught me to lean into fear. But it also left me anxiously wondering what would happen if I failed and depressed when I missed my self-imposed standards of academic perfection. By the end of middle school, I was convinced the world could see through my façade of confidence and excellence. Multiple high schools solidified this fact. The familiar “help me, I’m falling” sensation of breathlessness that accompanied social situations stayed with me for years, reminding me that confidence was an act. I prayed respectability would save me. Naturally, my prayers went unanswered. My anxiety grew in the absence of answers.

Occasionally I wonder what radicalized me. I think it was that first accidental touch of my hair in its natural state my senior year. The curls in waves crawling together in pursuit of water spoke to me. It whispered to me of an Afrofuturist reality where my hair wasn’t my biggest life insecurity.  I obliged by setting it free and allowing it to enter rooms regardless of my anxious fears. I learned of the societal investment that billions of dollars have in the stock of racial and gendered insecurity. 

I went to university to study psychology to make sense of the world. I secretly hoped that I’d gain the tools to make sense of my brokenness. I found something inconclusive. The texts pathologized Blackness as a problem to be fixed but offered no solutions. The counseling center – a resource I couldn’t have accessed if tuition didn’t include a limited number of “free” sessions – was staffed by people who couldn’t relate to me. They suggested that I wasn’t entirely broken, but I wasn’t precisely “okay” either. Again, they didn’t know what was wrong. 

But unexpectedly, my course curriculum, thanks to the infrequent presence of Black feminist theories, did. I remember reading Audre Lorde’s “The Master’s Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master’s House” and feeling visible for the first time. I thought back to the counselors and the messaging I held on to and wondered if I wasn’t a problem to be solved for the first time. What if, I wondered, my alternating cycles of anxiety and depression had been communicating that the society, not the self was flawed? 

Unknowingly, I started to couple my anxiety and depression with my newfound analytical skills as tools to reconfigure my world. My readings suggested that my peers’ response was a projection of what we were all struggling to navigate—a white supremacist society. I learned to pay serious attention to the situations, environments, and types of people who triggered my feelings of discomfort and ask why. Of course, my growth wasn’t linear. Marriage, motherhood, and loss forced me towards a reconfiguration of my dreams. These events meant slowing down but also speeding up because others depended on me. 

When I noticed that I was struggling more frequently, I saw therapists and learned to survive on their words’ marginal assistance. With a better sense of who I was, I took what I could and left the rest.

There are bad days. But each time I face a situation that causes me fear, I’m reassured that I’m a step closer to who I want to be in the world. I continue to see my mental health as my secret weapon aimed at keeping me safe.  I made a pact to myself to listen when something doesn’t feel right. It’s the best decision I’ve ever made.

About six months ago, I found a Black woman counselor who understood that it wasn’t me; it was the world that is broken. It was immensely freeing to find someone who understood the weight of the burden I was carrying. When we talk, her words affirm me, like Audre, in a way the world rarely does.

But I’m different now. I understand I’m not a problem to be solved. I’m a person who is coping as they work to change a broken society. And when the things I love are the triggers of the bad feelings, I think back to that awkward young girl being carried away by the waves of her hair for the first time. And I run towards them.

Photo by Tai's Captures on Unsplash

If your Instagram feed is anything like ours, it’s full of menstrual justice activists and organizations all working to end period poverty and smash menstrual stigma. But it’s important to consider: what accounts do you follow? Whose perspectives are you seeing? Whose experiences are you learning about?

BIPOC activists have been kept out of menstrual equity organizing, looked over, under-appreciated, and had their intellectual and emotional labour co-opted and stolen from them since the movement began. In the fight for menstrual equity and justice, it’s vital to centre the experiences of marginalized folks and organizers, to support them, and to amplify their voices and work. 

The reproductive rights movement focuses on the legal right to access reproductive care and support, like menstrual products, abortion, and birth control. Reproductive Justice, on the other hand, seeks to tackle these issues with an intersectional approach, acknowledging the compounding impact of racism, and other forms of oppression, on access to products, healthcare, family planning, and the right to have and raise a family.

“Indigenous women, women of color, and trans* people have always fought for Reproductive Justice” but the term Reproductive Justice was first coined by a group of black feminist activists in Chicago 25 years ago, who later founded the organization Sistersong. Sistersong’s mission “is to strengthen and amplify the collective voices of indigenous women and women of color to achieve reproductive justice by eradicating reproductive oppression and securing human rights.”

With that in mind, here are 5 badass BIPOC menstrual justice activists, who you should follow, support (with your time, and if you are able, money), and learn from:

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Chelsea VonChaz Founder of #HappyPeriod, @wearehappyperiod

Chelsea VonChaz and her mom Cherryl Warner founded #HappyPeriod in 2015 with the mission to support menstruators who would otherwise go without period products. #HappyPeriod works “to spread awareness on menstrual health, eliminate the stigma surrounding menstruation, and provide people with periods options that are good for their wallet, their body, and the planet”.

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Ileri Jaiyeoba, founder of Code Red Collective, @coderedco

When Ileri was 16 she founded Code Red Collective. The organization is breaking the menstrual taboo by supporting through product donations, advocacy and menstrual literacy. Taking a holistic approach to menstrual equity, the Code Red Collective is actively working to dismantle “inaccessibility and [the] lack of intersectionality when it comes to period wellness and the community problems surrounding it.” 

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Nayanka Paul, co-founder of The Bloody Bitches nonprofit, @bloodybtchs

The Bloody Bitches nonprofit takes an intersectional approach to addressing period poverty co-founded by Nayanka Paul and Zoë Vella. Their organization focuses on four connected “tiers of period poverty”: accessibility, education, environmental justice, and fundamental rights.

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Amber Garcia, Executive Director of Women’s Voices for the Earth, @womensvoices 

Amber is the executive director of Women’s Voices of the Earth, an organization that is on a mission to “eliminate the toxic chemicals that harm our health and communities”. As the Executive Director at WVE,  Amber brings her experiences working with the Colorado Organization for Latina Opportunity and Reproductive Rights (COLOR). COLOR is an organization that advocates for Reproductive Justice, and highlights the experiences of Latinas, their families, and allies.  

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You might have seen the take over that No More Secrets did on our Instagram, If not, here’s a reminder: No More Secrets distributes around 38,000 period products per week across America Through their work and the hashtag #blackgirlsbleed. Through #blackgirlsbleed Lynette and No More Secrets have created a platform that addresses systemic racism in the menstrual health space through storytelling and amplifying black voices.

All of these organizations accept donations, please visit their websites and Instagram pages to learn how you can help out! 

Image via The Gender Spectrum Collection

Our blog post today is brought to you by the team over at Flax Sleep.

Your period is nothing to lose sleep over, but unfortunately, menstruation and overheated, uncomfortable and disrupted sleeps often go hand-in-hand. While there are a number of factors that could cause sporadic and sudden temperature increases in the time around or during your period, hormones are often a key player in that game. Here are a few at-home remedies to help you limit those side effects and grab some much needed zzz’s.

Limit Your Caffeine Intake

Aside from blocking sleep-inducing chemicals in the brain, caffeine produces adrenaline and increases the heart rate - two things that definitely do not equal a good night’s sleep. The faster your heart rate is at the time you’re trying to doze off, the more likely you are to sweat and overheat. While it’s a good idea in general to steer clear of caffeine during menstruation in order to reduce cramping, abstaining may also help you keep those night sweats at bay.

Stay Calm

Easier said than done, right? We’ve all been there - not being able to fall asleep because you’re stressing and then stressing out more because you can’t fall asleep. It’s a sweaty, unpleasant and frustrating cycle that’s a tough one to break. Since stress is one of the main reasons why folks have a hard time falling asleep under any circumstances, finding a way to wind down and relax is absolutely beneficial to a good night’s sleep. Whether it’s something as simple as taking deep breaths or putting on audio of falling rain or other relaxing noises, it’s important to be mindful of your stress levels and to take the time to center yourself.

Avoid Eating Heavy Foods Before Bed

While you sleep, your body is still very much on the clock. Therefore, being mindful of what you eat directly before heading off to bed could help you get a better night’s sleep. Digesting and processing food takes energy and energy generates heat. Consuming foods that are high in saturated fats or animal proteins right before dozing off means that your body is going to kick things into digestion high gear and use an increased amount of energy, which ultimately contributes to overheated sleeps.

Go Au Naturel

A few practical changes to your bedroom and bedtime routine can make a big difference when it comes to temperature regulation while you snooze. Synthetic materials are more likely to trap in heat and make you sweat, so it’s best to avoid those as much as possible. Instead, opt for loose-fitting pajamas made out of natural fabrics and bedding made out of breathable, cooling fabrics such as linen.

Menstruation takes it out of you, plain and simple. Keeping cool, calm and collected during this time can seem daunting and unattainable (especially in the summertime), but with a few small actions, you’ll soon be on your way to a better night’s sleep.

The internet is great and all, but If you are experiencing severe and uncharacteristic overheating and sleep disturbances during menstruation, please go see your doctor to ensure that you are a-okay.

Photo by Kinga Cichewicz on Unsplash

Why did you choose to switch to reusable menstrual products? Many make the switch because they want to live a more sustainable life or they are worried about potential toxic chemicals in their disposable products. According to the advocacy group Women’s Voices for the Earth, dioxins, furans, pesticide residues and other potentially harmful chemicals have been found in conventional pads and tampons. It’s natural to feel anxious about potential chemical exposure in your period products. Reusables are not exempt from this either, with increasing interest in the chemicals that may be found in technical fabrics.

What is a sustainable fabric? For us, it is something that has a reduced carbon footprint, is made using traceable raw materials, and developed through strong relationships with our manufacturers to ensure transparency around chemical inputs and certifications.  All four of these things drive our sustainability goals and today, we thought we’d take a walk through how our processes work together to produce what we believe is the world’s most sustainable period underwear. Let’s break it down.

Sustainable Textiles

Our underwear, including our Truetex™ gusset blend, draws from three major types of fibre: organic cotton, Tencel™ Lyocell and recycled polyester. These fibres have various properties that make our undies high performance powerhouses — wicking moisture, absorbing blood and generally creating the super-comfy experience we want for all periods. Making anything has an impact on our planet, and there are a lot of pros and cons to be weighed.

Organic cotton is grown without insecticides, pesticides and is not genetically modified. Choosing organic is particularly impactful for cotton, which covers just 2.5% of our planet’s total agricultural area, it uses 7% of all pesticides and 16% of all insecticides. Our Luna Undies relied on organic cotton; it was a sustainable choice but also had limitations. Cotton is absorbent, but heavy when wet, and organic cotton is lower yield, meaning its water consumption is significant. 

To make our underwear even more high-performance, we explored Tencel™ Lyocell and recycled polyester. Polyester is essentially plastic and comes from a fossil fuel feedstock. Recycled polyester allows us to take garbage (in Aisle’s case, specifically pre-consumer waste — think plastic scraps from manufacturing) and convert it into something useful; it also means that we can take advantage of the quick drying and wicking properties of polyester. We also added Tencel™ Lyocell. Tencel™ is the brand name for Lyocell specifically produced by Lenzing. It is derived from trees, and is produced through a proprietary process that is closed-loop, minimizing chemical waste. Tencel™ is also more absorbent and breathable, two highly desirable properties.

Sustainable Processes

These sustainable textiles form the basis of a truly eco-friendly pair of undies. However, it’s not just about the textile, but the process that gets it there. Our fabrics use various certifications from the Control Union, certifying our organic cotton and recycled polyester, and Oeko-Tex® Standard 100, which is a chemical management certification. Oeko-Tex® Standard 100 specifically focuses on chemicals and dyestuffs used in the production of textiles and products, and covers more than 300 chemical substances. To receive the certification the component must pass specific testing through Oeko-Tex® site visits and tests throughout its entire production (from fibre, yarn to fabric to finished material). If no harmful substances are found, a certification and report are provided. This process can be completed for an entire product (where threads, buttons, and the garment production facility are considered) or for each individual material. Our certifications are at the material level. We designed our Truetex™ specifically to avoid the use of added chemical finishes, which are popular to change the properties of textiles. They’re not usually great for the planet, so we try and skip ‘em. 

We also work hard to make sure that our production processes are ethical; we visit our factories, ask for compliance with a rigorous supplier code of conduct, to ensure worker safety and positive working conditions. We’re always evaluating our processes to ensure that we’re improving our sustainability practices through our supplier survey and regular conversations with vendors and industry experts. 

Thinking Through Everything Else

Sustainability is a process. We think about how to reduce packaging, and try to ensure that the packaging we do use is recyclable. We want to learn more about the impact of our products, cradle-to-grave, and performed a life cycle analysis in 2020 to deepen that knowledge. (You can see the results in the ticker on our website!) We evaluate our carbon footprint every year; including eschewing air freight in favour of greener sea shipping. Where possible, we embrace a zero waste production process. Our attitude is every little bit helps, and we’re confident that we’re making a difference in shifting from a linear economy to something more circular. 

What don’t we do? We don’t make claims like “our underwear is chemical-free”. For us, this smacks of greenwashing and is anti-science — the world is made up of chemicals, baby! —  and we think that being sustainable is more than organic cotton or sustainable packaging. We’re committed to making the most sustainable undies possible, and that starts with being really real with what we do.

Menstrual equity was a term that I had not ever heard until I started working here at Aisle. I’d heard about period poverty, but could not rattle off stats off the top of my head, and definitely did not fully grasp the scope of it. Now I constantly hear myself telling anyone who will listen: “did you know that one-third of people who menstruate under the age of 25 in Canada struggle to afford the products they need every month?” 

How did I get here? A lot of reading and googling, mostly. Keep reading for a brief overview of what menstrual equity is, and what you can do to help your community.

Brief content notice: Some of the links mentioned contain gendered language.

Let’s start with some definitions. 

Menstrual equity is a relatively new phrase coined by Jennifer Weiss-Wolf in 2015. Essentially, it’s a framework for engaging policymakers. It’s meant to acknowledge the importance of and need for public policy to address the safety, affordability, and availability of menstrual products for everyone who needs them. 

Period poverty is, at its most basic, economic conditions where it is difficult or impossible for individuals to buy menstrual products. So basically, it’s scenarios where people who menstruate have to choose food or having enough money for rent over getting a new pack of pads or tampons. If you want to read more about period poverty in Canada specifically, check out this blog post.

Period poverty is a complex issue. There are so many factors that contribute to it, and the situation varies wildly from place to place, person to person. 

Here’s the good news though, you don’t have to solve this on your own, and we’re not starting from scratch. 

One thing that activists have been working towards worldwide is eliminating the tampon tax. The tampon tax refers to the sales tax that’s applied to all menstrual products, not just tampons. 

In Canada, the tampon tax was eliminated back in 2015, but in the US, it varies state to state. For example, there’s no tampon tax in Oregon and New York. However, California still has the tampon tax. And you know what’s not taxed in California? Chocolate bars. Does your state have a tampon tax? If so, is there a petition going around to eliminate it? 

Now, of course, eliminating the tampon tax is not going to solve the problem by itself. It’s much bigger than that. So what else can be done?

Act local!

Research local organizations near you who are already doing this work! I can pretty much guarantee that they do exist, but have next to no marketing budget to work with, which is why you may not have heard of them. You can search for period specific organizations, but it can also be helpful to get in touch with Indigenous advocacy groups, homeless shelters, LGBTQ+ organizations and domestic violence shelters and ask what supplies they need. 

Some things to keep in mind: 

• Do your research before making a donation! Take a look at their website and maybe consider contacting them with any questions you may have. Not every organization has the same donation needs, because they don’t all serve the same communities. In some cases, they might need boxes of unopened product, but other places may need things like masks or money.

• If you aren’t in a place where you can make a financial donation, maybe ask and see if they need volunteers, or if there’s any way you could get the word out. Many organizations are working towards having menstrual products distributed for free in schools, workplaces, and public libraries, and would probably appreciate your support with making phone calls or writing letters or emails to local representatives. 

• There are always more things to learn, and so many more perspectives to learn about. Menstruation is deeply, deeply personal, and there is no one-size-fits-all solution to period poverty. We have to be sure that we’re applying an intersectional lens to these conversations in order to be sure everyone’s voices are being heard.

What else can be done?

• Sign petitions
• Contact local representatives
• Vote!
• Keep talking about periods. Stigma is a big contributor to period poverty, and normalizing menstruation and removing the stigma surrounding periods in general will help us have more in depth conversations about menstrual equity as well. 
• Follow folks on social media! Here are some people/orgs we love:
• #HappyPeriod and their founder, Chelsea VonChaz
• No More Secrets
• Jennifer Weiss-Wolf
• FreePeriodsCanada
• The Period Purse
• United Way Lower Mainland (BC)

Want to learn more?

Here’s a little reading list, to get you started:

• Period Poverty in Canada
• The Hidden Impact of Period Poverty in Prisons
• Periods Gone Public
• ACLU’s period equity toolkit

More of a documentaries person? We gotchu:

• The Bloody Truth About Period Poverty in America
• Period. End of Sentence. (This one won an Oscar for Best Documentary Short Subject)!

And if periods really aren’t your thing, there’s also a lot to be said for learning more about reproductive justice in general, or even learning a bit more about sex-ed. We love the Sex Ed with DB  podcast.

All of these things are interconnected, and there’s a lot of work and learning to be done! We hope that there’s an item on this list that resonates with you and empowers you to join the push for menstrual equity, no matter where you live. 

Photo by Gabrielle Rocha Rios on Unsplash

Alright, so by this point we’ve all heard and memorised the line “Halloween is going to look a little different this year”, which, though annoying, is absolutely true. However, that doesn’t mean that spooky season is cancelled! 

Here are some ways to get into the Halloween spirit from the safety of your home:

Get crafty!

Check out these adorable (free!) print-at-home kits from Low Poly Crafts. 

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A post shared by Low Poly Crafts (@lowpolycrafts) on Oct 25, 2020 at 8:03am PDT

These ghosts are so cute that they can be your companions year-round, tbh. Imagine how cute they’d look with a little winter hat on! If you’re not into ghosts, they also have bats, a gargoyle, and pumpkins.

Tampons also make great little ghosts, in case you’ve got some old ones lying around from when you made the switch to reusables and have been wondering what to do with them! 

Get Social

Have a Halloween party with your friends online! You can challenge each other to put together a last minute Halloween costume with just the items you’ve got lying around the house.

Or, if you’re tired of just chatting on zoom calls, you can always stream some spooky movies together. Here’s a collection of movies that pass the Bechdel test.

If you’re interested in a little bit of gaming, lots of games have special Halloween events happening! Remember the early days of the pandemic when everyone who had a switch was playing Animal Crossing? They’ve got some things planned for Halloween! It might be worth checking out your island this week. 

You can also get your friends together for a game of Among Us which can be played on your phone (and is free to download)! This game is so popular that even AOC is playing it. Completing tasks on a spaceship may not be directly tied into Halloween, but being an imposter and slowly taking out your friends one by one certainly fits the overall vibe.

Or don’t

Why not have a private Halloween party? There are lots of recipes out there for cute Halloween themed treats. Curling up with some cute cookies, some hot chocolate, and a horror novel or a true-crime podcast sounds like a pretty cozy Halloween to us! 

Alternatively, why not do a tarot pull or get one done for you? You can light some candles and do a little journaling or self-reflection on the card(s) you pulled and it might just feel a little bit like you’re casting a spell.

Take a peek outside

It’s a full moon this Halloween, and not only that, it’s also what’s known as a Blue Moon! Why not take a moment to get a good look at the moon this Halloween? (Psst, did you hear NASA found evidence of water up there?)

If the sky ends up being overcast where you live, are there any little once-in-a-blue-moon treats you could indulge in this Halloween?

Or, you can just skip it all

Is Halloween not your thing? Totally cool! Then why not take a moment to enjoy the fact that you basically don’t have to celebrate it at all this year! And since it falls on a Saturday, it might be a good opportunity to check in with yourself and your space. Are there any decorations you can put up to make your home feel extra cozy for the upcoming winter? (You’ve already seen all the Christmas decorations popping up on social media and in the seasonal aisle of the grocery store, I assume).

However you choose to celebrate, we hope you have a safe and spooky Halloween!

Photo by Łukasz Nieścioruk on Unsplash

A couple of weeks ago we had the pleasure of interviewing Lydia Morrow on our Instagram stories! We wanted to share it here, just in case you missed it.

First up, introductions! Could you tell us a little bit about who you are, and what you do?

Hi! I’m Lydia, I run the account @whatlydiamade on Instagram. I’m kind of a designer, maker, sometimes model, I post about the fashion that I like. I used to run an underwear business but I don’t do that anymore which is kind of what I’m here to talk about today. Nice to meet you.